Day 4 Screwed up

Day started out good, nice ice cold OJ for breakfast, roasted turkey sandwich on whole grain bread, easy mayo, mustard, cheddar cheese, 52oz water.
Then the downhill started, after I finished cleaning a house I was hungry and running around, so I stopped at McDonald's and got a large fry, I also took one home to Micahal, who has the flu, and finished my errands.

Once I was home, the frys didn't taste as good as they should have, don't know if that was guilt kicking in.

Had more water, then I just had a flash, I hate it when my pants wear out at the inner thigh, that's so embarrassing, even my stomach looks like an ass if I wear the right pants, nasty, it made my do isolated body contractions, first the stomach, a physical trainer showed me, and when done right in a few days you realize that under all that flub you actually have muscles, worked on my facial exercises because my snoring is so bad it keeps my husband awake.
I did find if I don't eat chocolate late in the afternoon he doesn't complain as much about it. Then dinner, holy hell!!
I was fine, online for teryaki chicken with broccoli and brown rice, then the phone rang, Dena was on her way home and she bought stuff to make homemade hamburgers and fries, oh yes!!! my whole body was HELL YEAH!! then my mind was that annoying angel on my shoulder, "you shouldn't eat that" f-off I said, I had a hamburger with bacon, Ortega chilies, cheese, and french fries with blue cheese dressing.
 I haven't had this since I lived at home. My mom made it (without the fat though), I didn't do the "cut your plate in half" thing, I ate it all, wow was I happy, then 20 minutes later hit, I was too full to function. Cracked open a Diet Sierra Mist and got to work making a pop up birthday card, very cool I must say, but I felt bad the whole time, so I went to bed really late and threw off my clock for today(1/5).
That I will get to later.
I did get exercise in yesterday, any thing I had to bend to clean I turned into squats, and isolated my abs while vacuuming.
You know everyone has the dream of being sexy and all that, I just want to look good naked and with clothes on, I only look in mirrors that show shoulders up, I can't stand taking pictures, I feel really ugly, and you know your fat when all people say is "she has a great personality" or "wow you have such a pretty face", well watch this fuckers, I'm gonna have a hot body, pretty face and good personality to go with it.
You know I realize the madness starts with motherhood, well motherhood and a relationship, your boyfriend, yummy, is with you while your growing, he forgets how nice you looked before pregnancy, but then I always see him looking at those skinny girls, and he still says, "baby you look great".
LIES ALL LIES, well that's what my brain is telling myself.
The baby comes and your not having the huge belly sticking out, nope it has just decided to hang down, like a deflated ball, then you end up with the "click flap", you have to rent "Click" with Adam Sandler, you'll know exactly what I'm talking about.
That flap of fatty skin that makes you put on a longer shirt, or the comfy pants instead of the cute pants. I was strong and confident about myself before having kids, then strong and comfortable kicked in, now the 70lbs I originally gained has turned into has turned into 100lbs I need to loose, why can't I get lucky with the flu, or some thyroid problem that kicks that little fucker into gear and viola! magnifico! I'm halfway there.
Signing off now, blog got behind, missed it yesterday. Need to get work done so I can update tonight.
Stay healthy, eat a cucumber.